Vice Presidential Nominees Gone Wild: The First and Last Episode
Posted by Katie Halper - October 3, 2008 at 11:00 am
By Katie Halper
And I thought last week's debate was laden with homo-eroticism. Well, the sexual tension at the VP debate last night was so thick, you could drill it with a drill. Could Palin and Biden share a sordid side-- and a sexual history? Who could blame Sarah for falling for Biden's charms? He is, after all, the real VPILF. (See the Biden Bonability story I broke.) It may be an Obama/Biden versus McCain/Palin race. But last night we got served a steaming hot Biden/Palin sandwich, on the side. Here are the best sexually charged inappropriate moments of the debate.
- Pre-Debate Foreplay starts with role play. Palin asks, "can I call you Joe?"
- They've spiced up the dynamic with a butch fem role reversal in which Sarah's lapel is ten times the size of Biden's. The Topsy Tail Palin rocks adds a school girl je ne sais quois.
- Palin tries to make Joe Biden jealous by blowing audience. She blows them a kiss and will engage in heavy winking throughout the night.
- Biden flirts back hot and heavy "you can call me Joe"
- Joe opens debate by alluding to their tried and true sexual compatibility and chemistry: "It is a pleasure to be with you"
- Biden refers to the bi-curious tendencies he and Obama share, which include bipartisan "reach arounds." [Obama] "reached across the aisle to Dick...Lugar, a Republican."
- Palin chastises Joe for being a bad boy and messing up her motto: "The chant is "drill, baby, drill" [not drill, drill, drill]
- Palin tries to drive Biden crazy with desire and jealousy, describing how McCain "pushed hard" during "the surge."
- Palin is bold in her preferences, and knows what she likes and does't like. She let's Joe know she's not a fan of early withdrawal: "We don't need early withdrawal"
- Palin reveals an intimate familiarity with Biden by mentioning the way Joe "points backwards."
- Joe brags about his stamina and virility: "You're very kind suggesting my only Achilles Heel is my lack of discipline. Others talk about my excessive passion."
- Palin has exotic and eclectic tastes: "Look at Lieberman, and Giuliani, and Romney, and Lingle," [ie i like the Jews, Ay-talians, whoever those weird people who get married to lots of women and hate black people are, and lesbians]
- Palin is not the only rainbow lover in town. Biden (and Obama) have a Jewish fetish: "No one in the United States Senate has been a better friend to Israel than Joe Biden. I would have never, ever joined this ticket were I not absolutely sure Barack Obama shared my passion."
- Palin hints at a menage a trois with McCain and Kissinger: "I had a good conversation with him recently. And he shared with me his passion for diplomacy. And that's what John McCain and I would engage in also." [Unclear whether the "would" is conditional or preterit; so this has either already happened or is on the table. Though one would imagine that during their 35-year friendship McCain and Kissinger have shared beaucoup menages.]
- Palin announces that she and McCain have already initiated their relationship: "John McCain has already tapped me and said, that's where I want you, I want you to lead. I said, I can't wait to get and there go to work with you."
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Comments
Tapped
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 12:06 pm by Kat (not verified)On the radio this morning, they were all laughing at the "John McCain has tapped me" line, theorizing that even Gwen Ifill probably sat up in her chair when she heard that.
Very odd post.
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 12:13 pm by Anonymous (not verified)Very odd post.
Ugh.
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 12:25 pm by Hudson (not verified)Too much information!
Meh.
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 1:16 pm by Anonymous (not verified)Meh.
content may be unsuitable for children.
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 2:11 pm by momfrommaine (not verified)And to think I actually allowed my children to watch this!
You
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 2:14 pm by Kay (not verified)are very naughty Al! Very witty.
MILF's, VPILF's & American Pie
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 4:51 pm by Nancy ChesterI must admit that my ignorance of the definitions for PILF & VPILF drove me to Google to try to relieve my cultural deficits. PILF & VPILF are variants of the original MILF which comes from the 1999 teen comedy American Pie.
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/MILF
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Pie_(film)
Credit where credit is due
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 4:53 pm by Al GiordanoKay - It may be naughty to invite Katie Halper to post her diary here, but she gets credit for the words, not me!
- Al
Doncha wanna watch
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 5:23 pm by Suzy ShureDoncha wanna watch the video of the Katie Halper interview of Sarah, I can't wait...wink, wink, wink.
You are hilarious, thank you
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 7:00 pm by Katie (not verified)Any humor we can get into this campaign is welcome! thank you for making me laugh out loud! On a serious note, it's gross how she flirts with "Joe Six Pack" and sadly, I'm sure some of them will vote for her hoping to make their fantasies reality.
Wrong Party?
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 8:12 pm by Catherine CainMeh. I felt like I was reading a blog of one of the many sexually deprived Republican wingnuts. Sorry, Katie, but I find this far from funny. To be funny, doesn't it have to be truthful? It's a stretch to interpret anything Biden said or did last night as "sexually charged". I guess to each his own...
Catherine: Why it matters
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 10:53 pm by Lenore (not verified)Al's bit is a bit funny, but sex sells, as Rich Lowry of the National Review knows:
"I'm sure I'm not the only male in America who, when Palin dropped her first wink, sat up a little straighter on the couch and said, "Hey, I think she just winked at me." And her smile. By the end, when she clearly knew she was doing well, it was so sparkling it was almost mesmerizing. It sent little starbursts through the screen and ricocheting around the living rooms of America. This is a quality that can't be learned; it's either something you have or you don't, and man, she's got it."
Sounds gross, but the fact is that it works. My liberal friends libertarian hippie-ish husband scared her and her son by being bedazzled by Palin. By winking and sweetly smiling while uttering phrases like "stinking corpse" she just slips it to you. Or a guy, anyways. And women want so badly to see themselves in a politician that, unless they get jealous of their husbands' attentions.
Yecchh.
Thanks, Katie
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 11:05 pm by Nancy (not verified)You made me laugh. Keep writing!
Did the governor's performance
Submitted October 3, 2008 - 11:23 pm by Dan Carrborder on sexual harrassment, or did it cross the border?
Not for me to say, but humor often sees a side of experience that is eventually proved too true for the moment of its first occurrence.
ewwww...
Submitted October 4, 2008 - 2:33 pm by Kris JohnsonThat reminds me of this, as seen on Olbermann's Worst Person last night:
http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=NDYzMGFiNjQ0MWRjNmI0ZTlkYjgwZTE...
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